What Do You Do When Your Spouse Won’t Communicate With You?
Question by Hottie here: What do you do when your spouse won’t communicate with you?
My husband is apparently having some sort of problem… he has been making my life a living hell. He works late, and he tried waking me up 5 times on Saturday very late… I was sleeping and getting pissed about it. Realizing he was drunk, I just asked him to leave me alone… plus I had to get up early to do some volunteer work. Apparently this upset him, so he went to his friends house at 4AM… I just went back to sleep, I wasn’t going to stress over it and fight with a drunk. I went to my volunteer thing, and returned at noon… he still wasnt’ home. He waltzed in around 1230, and angry with me… I just kept my mouth shut, thinking he might still be drunk. Then he got dressed and went straight to work. I decided… I’m not going to push him, obviously he’s having problems and he can come to me when he’s ready. But if I push him to talk, he will just blame me for everything. I am soooo sick of being blamed for everything… again, he tried waking me up at 3AM while I was sleeping.. I had to go to work, and being woken up every night gets really irritating to me… nothing good can be said at 3AM. I shrugged him off, finally I called him today… he’s STILL pissed… I stayed calm and asked him what his problem is? He pretty much just got pissed with me, started to tell me he didn’t want to talk only when I wanted to. I told him, well talking at 3AM is not going to happen..I’m sleeping and I cannot wake up every nite at 3AM because I need my sleep for my own sanity.
Anyway, he hung up on me… and then text mssged me that he didn’t care to solve any problems with me and blah blah blah. I just texted back, “ok, well I”m not going to play this game… I asked you whats wrong, you don’t want to talk and you prefer to scream at me… so clearly, a solution is not possible. I’m an adult, I’m not your mother and if you can’t figure out how to solve problems then you have serious growing up to do.”
So… what do you think? Do you think he’s trying to avoid telling me what his problem is? Do you think he’s just being a child? What do I do next? I’m calm, I don’t want to argue and I just want to figure out what his real problem is. I know my problem is his alcohol, I can’t deal with it and it makes my life insane… so I just ignore him if he’s drunk, problem is when he comes to bug me and wake me up 5 times during the night because he’s drunk. I just want him to realize that, if I participate and get mad at him he will blame me. He blame me for EVERYTHING possible… I”m tryinng to eliminate any possibility of blaming me.
what should I do next?
Well… I can’t and won’t communicate while he is drunk. And the only time he does want to talk, is at 3 or 4AM when he IS drunk… and thats every nite! Last time I tried to talk to him when he was drunk, he got pissed and I had to leave to a friends house… or else, he leaves… its IMPOSSIBLE to talk when he is drunk… impossible!
Best answer:
Answer by Art M
Sounds like he might need psychiatric care asap.
Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!
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