How to Help an Alcoholic Friend: What Should I Do for My Sisters Own Good?

Question by Melissa: What should I do for my sisters own good?
Okay,so im17.i have a little sister that is only 11.she is very independent,not many friends.well last month my im and dad split up.he was a over controlling alcoholic who was a loser.i was glad when he left.well now my mom has freedom in 20 years.she is becoming horrible.she is coming home at 3-4 in the morning.she comes home drunk,pissed, and not doing her motherly duties.also,she brings home these ratty,scummy,drunk guys and calls them friends.then they go in her room and have sex.my sister is home to hear them,it’s not like there quiet.i understand its natural,we all do it,but really,in front of her.me and her are both girls,so we talk.but last night she comes up to me and was like,we’ll i know that mom and her bf are having sex,but why is she doing that when I’m home.i have tried talking to my mom about but she’s lik,gro up.she threatens to make us live with our dad which is like a horrible thought.im just so confused about why.and for you who say grow up,screw you,try being 11 and going through this,it would suck.she cries herself to sleep each night! Thanks.

Best answer:

Answer by PokahantasNY
Wow, that is so hard. You are right, your mom is not being a mom right now. I’m a mom, and when I started dating again, I never brought “my friends” home, except one. That “one” is my fiance. She can’t relive all those years she lost when she was with your dad and she needs to realize that. She is being very irresponsible and not being a very good example for you or your sister. Do you have any other family members you can confide in, like grandparents or aunts or uncles? You are right, you and your sister have every right to feel safe and sound in your home, and your mom bringing in all these strangers into your home is definitely not a safe situation at all. Also, sounds like your dad isn’t the only one with a drinking problem, it may be that your mom was better at hiding it.

The next time your mom brings a “friend” home, see if you can take your sister for a sleepover over a family member or friend’s house. if she asks why, plainly (and calmly) tell her that you and your sister do not feel safe when she brings all these so called “friends” over and that you guys are staying over somewhere else until her friend leaves. if it keeps happening, you might have to consider other options. if you want to know what those may be, please email me. I am so sorry that you and your sister have to live through this, but I commend you for sticking up for your sister.

Sending tons of hugs your way!

Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!

When Your Friend Is An Alcoholic
Filed under: how to help an alcoholic friend

"Tammy, I think you have a problem with alcohol. I think you are an alcoholic, and I cannot be friends with you until you get help." I described some of her behaviors that made me think so. I described the hurt and worry she was causing me. She said …
Source

 

Rotary gets real
Filed under: how to help an alcoholic friend

He feels responsible for the death of his best friend with whom he did drugs. Mike overdosed twice, which he believed he did "on purpose" because of his shame, he said. He eventually started snorting and shooting up heroin, then became an alcoholic.
Source

 

Randy Rhoads Remembered: An Interview With Ron Sobol, Author Of Randy
Filed under: how to help an alcoholic friend

The oversize book, which is accompanied by a delicious documentary featuring live footage and interviews, brings to life the Randy Rhoads who was a friend and band-mate, practical joker and budding guitar player. …. Yeah, she was a big help. A lot of …
Source

 

Related How To Help An Alcoholic Friend Information…