Alcohol Abuse Advice

Question by Sandra P: Please tell me if this is a good story so far.?
I know that I have a lot of spelling and grammer mistakes in here. If you see them could you tell me. This is set in 3 smaller chapters. And could you give me any more tips you think I need. It is ok if it sounds a little rude I can handle it.

~~~~~I love everything about rain, I personally think it cleanses the earth of all evil and unwanted things. But there are also frightening things that come with rain. It can block out all shound, can obscure your sight, and it can destroy anything as long as it rains hard and long enough. But it still cleanses the earth, is that a good thing or a bad thing? For example say someone was brutally murdered on the side of a road, there could be blood everywhere and you could see how hard that person fought to live. Then the heavens open up and rain pours down. The blood is washed away. All the grass and weeds get thrown around by the force of it that there is no sign of any kind of struggle. Were the heavens weeping for person or where they trying to get rid of the evidence, cover up for something that should not be here?
That is the reason I love the rain. You don’t know if you can trust it or not.~~~~~

Bang

Abbigale jumped and spun around looking for the source of the racket.

“Kate! You scared the shit out of me.” Abby frowned at her one and only so called friend.

“Why didn’t you tell me that tomorrow is your 21st birthday!” Kate growled with a hateful look on her face.

Abby sighed. She hasn’t told anyone that her sister Anna died on her 21st 2 years ago or the horrible events that came after. Because the morning of the 14th was the worst Saturday of her life. She woke up to her mother howling and her father drunk and screaming. Abby shook her head not wanting to remember that day.
Abby blocked that day from her memory she refused to relive it.

“I, uh, forgot. Sorry.” She said sheepishly.

“Bull…it’s the day you can finally drink.” Kate looked at her skeptically. “Well, want to go out? I’ll pay.”

“No I don’t drink, and I have to work the next morning.” Abby replied quickly jumping for any excuse and she really did have to work.

“So…you can forget your no drinking rule for one day.” Kate said stubornly.

“No. I don’t like feeling of being drunk.” She really didn’t and after Anna’s death she swore to never take another sip of alcohol.

“Whats not to like?”

“Trust me theres plenty not to like.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Pretty Please?”

“No.”

“Pretty pretty please?” Kate begged batting her eyelashes.

“No!” Abby could feel her anger rising. Lately she has had a very short fuse exspecially when it was lit by Kate.

“Why?” Kate pouted.

“I already told you.”

“Thats not a good reason. Come on its your 21st.” Now Kate was getting more angry.

“Yes it is and who told you tomorrows my birthday?” Abby scowled.

“Your brother.” She replied sheepishly.

“I am going to kill Mike for this.”

“Please come out with me for one night?” Sticking her thin lower lip out.

Abby couldn’t take her annoying pleading now. “No! Get out of my house you are pissing me off.”

“What?” Kate asked in horror.

“It’s not like I have never kicked you out before. Out!” Abby yelled pointing to the front door.

“So it’s still rude! And No.” Kate said sitting down on the chair with a little more umph than she planned. The chair tipped over throwing her on her back and her curly red hair getting tangle in her glasses.

Abby still pointing at the door smiled as Kate got up and stalked out the door.

She sighed when Kates car went skidding down the street and she was finally gone. Why couldn’t she have friends who actually cared? All Kate probably wanted was to get laid like always. And why the hell was she talking to Mike? Deciding she should call him and find out. She turned away from the dark window reluctantly and started to look for her cell.

Abby found the small phone plugged in and resting on the kitchen counter. Picking it up she saw that she had one missed call from Mike. She pushed send and put the phone to her ear.

” Ab hide fast Kate is coming over! She saw that it’s your b-days tomorrow. ” Mike yelled into my ear.
“Oww.” Abby said pulling the phone away from her ear. “She was already here.”

“Shit. What happened?” He actually sounded worried.

“Nothing really. But she did piss me off so I kicked her out.” She said matter of factly.

“Really and she listened?”

“Not at first but she embarrassed herself so she left.”

“What did she do?” He asked with a little humer in his voice.

“She tried to sit down in the old comforter and it threw here out.” Grinning to herself it was actually funny.

Mike between laughs said, “I wish…I could have…seen it.” Slowly the laughs subsided and he asked, “So what are you going to do tomorrow?”

“Absolutly nothing.”

“Just like I did. It was the best birthday I ever had.” He said proudly
“Ha, yeah right.”

“It was. Oh I should tell you that I am making you dinner and I don’t care if you say no because I’m doing it anyway.”

Groning on the inside, “Thats cool I guess.”

“Hey I gotta go the games back on. Love ya Ab.”

“Love you too.” Abby replied sadly and shut the phone.

Abby decided it was late enough to get ready for bed so she went to her room for a new change of clothes then headed for the shower. After stripping her clothes she jumped in and started scrubbing her long black hair with Jasmine scented shampoo. The smell put her in a better mood so she decided to shave her legs too. When the water turned could she grabbed a towel got out being careful not to drip water every where. After she dried off she put a tank top and pajama bottoms on and looked in the mirror. The only thing she could she through the fog were her dark blue eyes. Smiling to herself she headed off to bed and fell asleep instantly.
Knocking at the door is what woke Abby up growling she pulled her pillow over her head hoping that if she ignored them they would go away. The knocking got louder and louder. Now very angry she slipped out of bed and almost fell flat on her face but caught her ballance at the last second. Taking deep even beaths hoping that would help but instead her head started spinning more. She sat down quickly and placed her head between her legs begging for it to stop.
After about 5 minutes she felt a little better so she slowly stood up. She felt a little weak but the spinning had stopped. The person banging on the door was starting to drive her mad. She slowly walked to the front door and put her hand on the doorknob and the knocking instantly stopped. She swung the door open and looked around. There was no one in site. She took a few steps out the door and looked down the street they were empty. Now she was angry. She turned to go back inside and slipped on something and landed on her but.
While taking a deep breath to calm herself she saw and envolope sitting in front of her. That can’t be the reason she was woken up. She grabbed it and stood up looking to make sure no one saw her. She hobbled back into the house and went to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. When she sat down she looked at the evil little piece of mail. There was nothing on it but a picture of starinside a diamond, and a round those was a circle.

“Wierd.” She whispered and opened it. Inside were 2 pieces of paper. One of the sheets looked like a scheduel but a very wierd one.
Classes start on September 1st at 8pm

8:00 p.m. 1st – Identifying Powers – Building 1 floor 2

9:00 p.m. 2nd – History – Building 1 floor 3

10:00 p.m. 3rd – LCP – Building 1 floor 1

11:00 p.m. Break

12:00 a.m. 4th – Combat – Gym floor 3

1:00 a.m. 5th – Blood – building 2 floor 1

2:00 a.m. 6th – Defence – Gym floor 3

Dorm 1 – Floor 4 room 305
Confused she threw the scheduel to the side stood up and grabbed a cup out of the cupboard. After she put creamer in the coffee she took a sip, choked, and spit it out. The coffee tasted like shit. She checked to make sure she did everything right, she did which she didn’t understand. So she tried taking another sip, making a face there was something deffinately wrong. And this sip made her teeth hurt. She dumped the rest down the sink.

Frowning she went to the bathroom to scrub the taste out of her mouth. Even her mouthwash tasted odd. Maybe her tastebuds were messed up somehow. She looked up into the mirror and saw that her blue eyes seemed more electric.
What the hell is wrong with me?” She asked her reflection. Which obviously didn’t give her the answer she glared at it. Maybe she was getting sick. She had to be, there was no other way to describe how she felt. The dizziness, her tastebuds, her eyes looked different to.

The shrill sound of Abby’s cell phone scared her which made her feel like time slowed down until she realized what it was. “Yea, I’m sick.” That was the only explanation she could come up with.

She ran to the kitchen hopping to get there before they hung up. She knocked the cell of the counter but a second before it hit the floor she caught it. She answered it immediately.

“Hello?” she asked wishing she looked to see who it was.
“Hey!” said the happy voice of Mike.

“Oh hey. Guess what just happened?”

“What?” He wondered.

“I just ran all the way through the house so fricken fast and then I knocked the phone down and grabbed it like an inch above the ground.” She said a little excidedly.

“Cool…so can I come over now? I have nothing to do and we haven’t hung out for a while.” He asked sounding like he might be afrade of the answer.

“Sure? Are you ok?” Abby asked wondering why he was asking to come over he never has before.

“Yeah fine, I just thaught you wanted to be alone today.”

“Oh, you don’t count. I like hanging out with you.” She said they always had fun when they were together. He was a dork and they could always find something to do.

“Cool let me in.” He hung up and then there was a punding on the door.
She walked to the front door and opened it with a confused look on her face. “How did you get here so fast?”

Mike smiled, “I was on my way here when I called.Now let me in it is raining out here.”

“Oh sorry!” she said stepping to the side.

He walked past her straight for the tv and started hooking up a ps3. “Want to play a racing game?” He asked looking over his sholder.

“Yeah!” She exclaimed. “I can kick you ass again.”

“Hey. I know your better quit rubbing it in. Plus I need to practice so why not practice with the best?” He said with his head behind the tv.

Smiling to herself she sat down on the couch in front of the flat screen and watch Mike doing what he does weekly.

When everything was hooked up he sat next to her on the couch and handed her a controler. “Ready?”

“Yeah what game are we playing?” She wondered.

“Carbon. It’s a playstation 2 game but one of the best.” He said proudly.
“So you’re hoping you can beat because of a new game?”

“No.” He said modestly.

“Ok. But it is not going to work. Your still going to loose.” She answers matter of factly with a grin on her face.

They both picked our cars and Mike picked the track. The count down started and when it side go her car took of and Mike’s peeled out. Her car glided trhough the whole track and finished first and Mike got stuck in most of the corners and came in last.

She looked him in the face with a huge smile on her face. “I Win!”
Abby was watching the sun set counting down the seconds untill the headmaster arrived. Mike watching a golf game on the tv asked, “Is he here yet?”

“Nope but it is starting to get dark so it should be soon.” Anxiously she sad next to him and started tapping her fingers on her leg. Looking at Mike she realized he was as impatient as she was.

Five minutes of them nervously looking out the window there was a knock at the door. “Go get it.” Mike told Abby.

“Wish me luck.” She whispered a little frightened.

She headed for the door with Mike just a step behind her. When she got there she took 2 deep breaths and slowly opened the door and gasped.
The man standing in front of her was the most beautiful man she had ever seen. He looked like he was in his mid 30’s. He stood head and sholder over her and was about 3 time her width. His brown curly hair hung over his sholders and his gold eyes were piercing right through her. He stuck out his hand and said, “You must be Abbigail.” And smiled a perfect smile.

“Y…yeah.” She stammered then cleared her throught. “And you must be the headmaster of Proprius Academy.” While shaking his hand.

“And you are?” He asked Mike.

“Mike, Mike Sanders. Abby’s older brother.” Mike said proudly.

“Hello, Mr. Sanders, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” The head master said politely with a hint of an English accent. “I am Samuel Orrick. You may call me Mr. Orrick or Headmaster Orick.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Abby and Mike replied in unison and they smiled at each other.
“Would you like to come in?” Abby asked.

“Please and thankyou.” He answered.

“Would you like anything to drink?” Abby asked.

“No thank you. I had something before I arrived.” He replied looking around the living room.

Headmaster Orrick sat in the old chair grasefully and invited them to sit on the couch. When they were settled He asked, “We should get on I’ll have to be leaving soon. Are there any question asto the letter I sent you today?”

“Yes.” Abby said confidently. “I didn’t fill out a form of any sort for the Academy. I don’t understand how I was accepted there.”

“Ah…You have had your name down for Proprius since the day you were born.” He confirmed.
“Did our parents put her name down?” Mike asked jumping into the conversation.

“No.” He answers him without adding an explanation.

Mike was glaring at Mr. Orrick so abby asked quickly, “Why was I accepted at this school?”

Mr. Orrick choosing his next words carefully. “You were accepted because,” Abby held her breath and it seemed as Mike was too. “You are one of the chosen ones…”

Mike interupted “One of the chosen ones? Whats that? Abby you are one of the chosen ones! how cool is that?” He said turning to Abby with a smile on his face.

She put a finger to her lips, “Shh… We still don’t know that it is.”

Mike looked back at Mr. Orrick and srugged, “Sorry, got excited.”
“No worries, A chosen one is one of 3 together they make up what is now called Proprius Academy because they are permenent, you can not change what you are. There is the Chosen, The Gifted, and The Cursed. The Chosen are what you may call a vampire, The Gifted use magic, and the Cursed shift in the form of a wolf.” He finished sounding proud.

Abby took a deep breath.

Mike was frowning, “So your saying she’s a vampire?”

“Yes that is exactly what I’m saying.” Mr. Orrick smiled at Abby.

Abby slowly let out her breath trying to think of a nice way to say he was crazy. “Um, I’m sorry Mr. Orrick but I don’t think I am what you are looking for.”

“Nonsence. You are exactly what I am looking for.” He said boldy.
Looking at the floor she said, “I can’t be. For one I was in the sun today, two I don’t have fangs, and three I don’t drink blood.”

Mr. Orrick laughed and it seemed to glide right through her. “Silly child, we can go in the sun… unfortionatly it isn’t very comfortable. For you it will gradually make you more uncomfortable. You already have fangs but I am sure you haven’t had the chance to extend them yet, and I am sure you are already loosing the taste for food or drink.”

“I don’t have fangs.” Abby complained showing them her teeth.

Mike looked closely, “Nope, No fangs.”

“See I told you so.”

Mr. Orrick smiled at her and two of his teeth started to grow untill they were fangs. “I am sure I can get yours to come out too.”
“Yeah right.” Mike said.

“Abby do you give me permition?” He asked still grinning at her.

Chills ran down Abby’s back but she nodded anyway.

In less than a second she was across the living room hitting the wall and sliding down it. Shocked she looked at Mr. Orrick who was now stalking closer reminding her of a wild cat hunting its prey. She jumped up and turned to run, he was faster than her and he was in front of her when she tried to take a step.

“What the Hell!” Mike yelled getting up.

“Don’t interupt us. I don’t want her attention on you when it happens.” Mr. Orrick hit her again sending her spinning onto the floor.
Getting pissed Abby jumped up faster than she should have hissing at him. Mike gasped causing Abby’s attention to turn towards him. Before her eyes found him she was hit again and went flying into her grandmothers antique mirror cutting her lip. She licked her lip and felt presure in her upper jaw, looking up now confused she put her hand to her mouth and felt 2 really sharp teeth.

“You couldn’t have just cut my finger and told me to taste?”

“I could have but this way was a little more intertaining.” He smiled at her.

Mike stuttered, “Y…you…You have fangs.” Then ran over and grabber her face examining her mout.

She swatted his hands away.
“Oww. You didn’t have to hit me so hard.” He complained.

“I smaked not hit. Quit complaining.” Dragging him back to the couch sitting down across from where Mr. Orrick was already sitting.

“You might want to be careful with swatting. Your strength is growing.”

“What? She gets to be stonger too.” Mike frowned, “Thats not fair.”

“That is not the only thing that will change.” Mr. Orrick Mr. Orrick said now staightening his shirt.

“What else?” Abby worried.
“I am sorry but it is time for me to be leaving I am already a little late.” He said looking at his watch. “You will get you questions answered when you arrive at the Academy on August 27 a few days before term starts.” Rummaging around in his pockets he pulled out a little silver key. “This is the key for your dorm room.”

“Can I come?” Mike pleaded.

“Sorry Mr. Sanders, you may visit and you may stay at the Academy until term starts but then you are out.”

“Oh well thats better than nothing.” He sounded a little bummed.

Mr. Orrick turned to abby befor closing the front door. “As for you Abbigail I will be seeing you in August.”

He was gone before the could ask any more questions.
***Ok that is all I am going to show. Please tell me what you think.***

Best answer:

Answer by anon
Show not tell.

Add your own answer in the comments!