Alcohol Abuse Advice

Question by Ciddy: I need advise depserately…please help?
My parents have been seperated for 5 months now, but have not filed for divorce yet. Of course I’m having to go through an emotional roller coaster, and no one’s there to lisen or care. I’m living with my mom. She has this “boyfriend” (she claims it’s only a friendship, but you’ll see my reasoning…) who she spend all the time with every day. Believe it or not, I like spending time with my mother. But it seems as if she’d rather spend time with him more than me. Yeah, I know, it sounds stupid to be upset over this, but all I ask for is a couple hours to spend with her and she barely gives me that. She’s made it that she spends time with her boyfriend in the day (we’re talking from 8:00 AM to around 8:00 PM) and spending the nights with me. The time she spends with me she acts bored and like she doesn’t want to be there, and falls asleep around 9:00 PM. I find this extremely unfair. Usually, her boyfriend will try to include me in their time together but I honestly do not like him. He is a huge alcoholic who can be really innapropriate(verbally). He absolutely HATES my father and refuses to have anyone speak about him while he’s around. When my dad came over on Christmas (this was the first time I saw him since he was kicked out in September) this guy (who’s name is Shawn) called my mother threatening to come and beat up my dad. And on the night of the super bowl, Shawn looked like he was about to grab my butt (I have no proof that he was going to do this, but that’s what it looked like) Now does this sound like the type of guy I want my mother dating?!?!
As I mentioned before, my mom and I are very close. Well, since this has been happening we’ve been getting into some pretty heated fights. She claims that I’m “selfish little b****” and that she’s an adult who can do whatever she wants regardless of my feelings. I don’t think I’m selfish, and I would own up to it if I was. I don’t ask for much other than some time with her when we aren’t at each others throats. I’ve tried talking to her about it in an adult manner, and I always think that everything will be better now that we’ve talked, but it never is. She continues to do what she usually does and gets this attitude like “I’m the boss and what I say goes.” It’s like my emotions mean nothing to her…

Tonight was our worst fight yet. I had asked her that (with in mond that, according to her, she’s not really dating him) if she didn’t have to brag to everyone how she’s always sepnding time with her considering my parents haven’t filed for divorce yet and that it’s kind of embarassing. She immedietly goes balistic on me, and the fight gets so heated that she threatens to leave, saying that she can no longer stand to be around me and that she hated me. What kind of thing is that to say to your only daughter?! Then, she left and went to Shawn’s house, leaving me clueless as to why she got so angry with me for no apparent reason!!! I’m at the end of my rope. I can not honestly live like this if she’s going to continue treating me this way. Maybe I am being selfish. Am I? I really don’t think I am…please help…
My dad is living out of his car, so I can’t go live with him.

Best answer:

Answer by gabri3lle
You are not being selfish you just love your mother and for her to put a man (alcoholic) before her child is a little stupid all your asking is for time to spend with her and she cant even do that for her daughter thats very messed up no disrespect but if she was a real mother she wouldnt call you a selfish little bitch and put a man before you obviously this man has her brained wash this man is up to no good doesnt need to be around you or her

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