Ways to Help an Alcoholic: Has Weed Changed Him Beyond Repair?
Question by van_wright: Has weed changed him beyond repair?
I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years. He didn’t smoke weed -he was actually against it- until last summer. He started by saying it’d be occasional and did it once every two months or so. It climbed up to a few times a week, then to everyday. At that point I did something I probably shouldn’t have done; I set a limit of once a month and told him that if he didn’t respect that, I’d be gone. He wasn’t totally fine with it, but respected it for a few months. He started getting angrier about being ”controlled”, so I told him he could do it once a week as long as he controls himself. He decided we needed a break and during the week we weren’t with each other, he smoked weed everyday, multiple times a day. When we got back together, he said he didn’t want to stay with me if he had to do it less than twice a month.
I don’t understand why weed means so much to him. He says it’s the only fun thing to do around here, that all his friends do it and he’s tired of having to say no, that he genuinely likes getting high and that he’s tired of me nagging him because of the ”pot thing”. I explained the negative aspects of it over and over, but he doesn’t seem to really care. He’s also taken up to smoking cigarettes and cigars, saying that it gives you a better high.
Some of his friends are getting into speed. He’s interested in trying it and I’m trying to persuade him not to. I don’t know why he changed so much, but now his whole summer seems to be revolving about “getting high with the boys”, “passing the bong” and “having seshes”.
I don’t want to give him up, but he’s not willing to stop or slow down. He doesn’t see what he’s doing to himself. He says our relationship would be way easier if I simply liked smoking weed, but I don’t like it (I’ve tried it a few times).
What worries me the most is that he’s acting like our relationship matters to him less and less the more he gets into weed. I’m scared for him and I want to help him, but he doesn’t see what he’s doing and I know I can’t help someone that doesn’t want to be helped.
Should I leave him now, or stick with him for a while hoping he’ll realize what he’s doing? He’s an awesome guy, but lately all revolves around pot and he’s getting moody and depressed on the days he’s not high. Is he “gone” for good? :(
Serious answers only please.
If you’re going to start talking about government propaganda, how weed is better than cigarettes, how pot is the way to go and ask “Would you rather him be an alcoholic?”, please don’t answer. I want an answer to my question, not your opinion on weed.
******CORRECTION: He said he wouldn’t stay with me if he had to do it less than twice a WEEK.******
Best answer:
Answer by skittlesss
Let him know that weed depletes (takes away) nutrition and certain nutritional deficiencies can have a major effect on the person’s health later on. I personally wouldn’t keep dating him. If he says that he would break up with you if he could only take weed less than twice a week… wow that says it all. he’s not worth it. If I were you (just my suggestion) I would say “either the weed is gotta go, or I’m going” and go from there. Maybe some day he will mature up and wished he hadn’t lost you.
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