I Am Separated From My Husband. We Have an 8 Year Old Daughter Together.?
Question by Jeannie: I am separated from my husband. We have an 8 year old daughter together.?
He is what he calls a “functioning alcoholic.” What that means to me is, he goes to work everyday and I won’t lie he is one of the hardest workers I have ever known. However starting on the drive home he starts drinking and is usually buzzed when he would arrive home. What we saw at home every day was anywhere from a buzzed person to a mean drunk and every combination in between. He makes 90K a year and won’t pay a cent of support for his daughter. Yes, I have a case started through the registry for child support. The reason he feels he shouldn’t have to pay is because I moved back “home.” This so happens to be from Georgia to Washington state so I really mean we moved. But? I had to go to where we would have support. I sort of had a feeling I wouldn’t get any support from him at first, so I was only planning ahead. He and I have both moved on in life. Now that he has this “new family” he won’t even write to his daughter, won’t call. She turned 8 this last weekend and she cried leaving him messages to call her. He never did. He won’t answer my calls or emails. I couldn’t believe that he wouldn’t even call his daughter on her birthday. She has been crying for most of the weekend and keeps telling me she isn’t pretty and she is fat. She is about as tiny and petite as they come. She has asked me I don’t know HOW MANY times, “Mommy, why doesn’t Daddy love me anymore?” I spent all weekend biting my tongue. I honestly don’t know how to answer this question. What is the correct thing to say? Is there a correct thing to say?
A Very, Very Sad Mommy.
Just to update some of the questions here…Yes, she IS old enough to understand. She remembers what it was like living there and the unpredictable behaviors exhibited by her Dad. I have not sugar coated a thing. We speak very openly to each other. She understands he is an alcoholic and what that means. One of her questions to me a while back was, “Mommy? Why does Heineken even make beer? They make my Daddy act dumb.” Her words, not mine. I explained to her that it is not the fault of Heineken, but that of her Daddy’s inability to stop drinking. I explained that all beer companies state warnings on their products to drink responsibly.
Best answer:
Answer by okeysg2
The truth will help. She is old enough to understand that her beloved dad is an alcoholic. Don’t sugar coat it either.
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