If You Witnessed a Friend Being Verbally Abused, Would You Intervene?
Question by Y: If you witnessed a friend being verbally abused, would you intervene?
My friend Vicki is 39. She recently went through a divorce, and is back in the dating world. One night at the bar, she met Rick. The have started “seeing” each other.
I can’t stand to be around them, because he constantly belittles her and talks down to her. There is no other word for it than verbal abuse. He calls her fat, stupid, crazy. One, when they were arguing, she told me he threatened to kill her. She constantly is trying to placate him and diffuse his anger. (She also said he claims he does not hit women.)
I have talked to her about it several times in public — never using the world “abuse” but telling her there are a lot of red flags flying with this guy (drug use, alcoholism, jealousy, anger, etc). She will stop talking to him for a few days, then he will call her, say he is lonely, and she goes over to his place immediately.
She is mad because I do not defend her when he treats her badly in from of me. I don’t say anything because 1. I don’t want him to ruin our friendship 2. I have told her how badly he is treating her, and it’s up to her to use or not use this Information and 3. they are both adults. (And 4, I am kinda scared at the way he would react.)
Thoughts?
Best answer:
Answer by amy29
It sounds like you are her good friend and when it comes time she will come to you and vent about him. In the mean time she is an adult and she can do as she pleases.
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